Brain Food, Dear diary


*8 a.m. – the alarm is ringing through my sour dream.*

Waking up in a roller coaster. I’m up here in my little black outfit, black pumps and my J. Lennon sunglasses. After I’ll finish my coffee, I’ll be ready for another ride.


Why are you hanging out there ? I see you abandon the field, afraid to risk, afraid to not get hurt. Afraid to not die. I saw you creeping around, maybe you’re playing hide and seek, maybe you want to run away like a coward … Do you like the winter ? I love coldness, white, snow. Winter is my boyfriend, but I’m in an love affair with the summer. When my soul is frozen, summer will embrace me. 

I open wide my eyes, still laying in my bed, I look up to the sun and light up a cigarette : I need a change. Maybe a new hair color. Maybe I should only change the bed sheet. No … I’m going to lay here until my body will shout in ache.  I have no inspiration for today, the sun is not shining enough to make it warm. Oh, it’s only Sunday. Maybe I should just continue dreaming …

Picture me in that black outfit. Still here. Roller coaster ride. I see you there stalking, wanting, deceivingshining. I can fly pretty high, my wings can make it far enough. I wish I could not see you at all, see your miserably pain, suffering alone, closing up, refusing to let it go, refusing help. Such a pitty. Oh darn it ! My wings are black from the dust you left behind. At least they can still take me through the hard wind. Oh the sky is so beautiful here. I fly higher and higher, slowly the image becomes so blurry and I hear a jazzy tune in the background …

Suddenly I open my eyes. Weird, I have some old dust marks on my back.

Check out the previous diary entry,  #12

Song of the day : Jan Garber – I’ll see you in my dreams

petit ☮

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